Extra Story 75: Dessert Platter

[Wisdom Tooth Extraction]

Tang Chu had her wisdom tooth extracted. She lay in bed, clutching her cheek and whimpering. The agony of not being able to open her mouth to eat far surpassed the pain of the extraction itself.

Gao Shan came in and asked, “What would you like for dinner? Pumpkin porridge, pudding, tofu pudding, snow fungus soup, steamed egg custard, creamy mushroom soup—none of these require chewing. Carp soup, crab roe tofu, silverfish and egg drop soup, tomato and sole, avocado and egg salad, coconut taro, blueberry with yam—you can swallow these with minimal effort. If you want meat, I can make steamed chicken drumsticks or spare ribs with black bean sauce, and steam them extra soft. For fruit, there’s papaya, banana, and white peach—you don’t need to chew those either. Want a bit of yogurt with them?”

(﹃)

Ah, suddenly her tooth didn’t hurt at all.

[The Chewing Habit]

Tang Chu discovered Gao Shan had a little vice.

Every straw he used was always flattened where his teeth had bitten down. When eating out with disposable cutlery, he’d gnaw the plastic spoons out of shape, and even the edges of paper cups and bowls weren’t spared. At home, the bamboo chopsticks with the most worn tips were definitely his favorites. Even porcelain and stainless steel spoons weren’t immune; though he couldn’t really bite through, there was often a faint clinking of teeth against them as he ate. Chicken and pork bones he’d chewed bore rows of teeth marks—anyone who didn’t know better might think this family lived in dire hardship, gnawing on bones for sustenance. When working out problems with pen and paper, if he got absorbed in thought, he’d unconsciously chew the end of his pen.

“Were you a rodent in your past life? Always biting and grinding on something?”

Um... and then she became his chew toy.

[Catching a Handle]

Tang Chu, though repeatedly defeated, never gave up on leveling up her cooking skills. After Gao Shan made breakfast—glutinous rice shumai, multigrain soy milk, fruit salad, octopus sausages, and more—she volunteered to add another dish: fried eggs.

Holding a pan in one hand and an egg in the other, she grew nervous before even turning on the stove. “Is there any trick to frying eggs? Teach me?”

Gao Shan crossed his arms. “Sorry, that’s really too basic. It’s like an elementary schooler asking if there’s a secret to memorizing the multiplication table. I’m afraid I can’t summarize any tips for you.”

Looking at the pan in her hand, Tang Chu suddenly recalled a joke she’d seen online recently. She pointed at the pan and commanded, “Hey! I’ve got a handle on you! Cooperate with me!”

Gao Shan: →_→

He walked over, took the egg from her hand. “You’ll get better cooperation out of me than the pan.”

Tang Chu turned, pointing a finger at his nose. “Fine! I’ve got a handle on you! Cooperate with me!”

He braced his hands on the edge of the counter, caging her between his arms and leaning in. “And just where have you got a handle on me?”

Uh, does she actually need to have a handle?

He took her hand, the one pointed at him, and guided it down, down... until she was holding him.

“Now you’ve really got a handle on me. Understand?” He lowered his head, voice dropping, “So, how would you like me to cooperate next?”

(*/╲*)

[Striking a Pose]

After Gao Shan recreated his caramel pudding alt, the two of them became pure PvX players. One day, Tang Chu logged on to Sword of Legends III using his eighteen-thousand-yuan desktop. With all the graphics settings maxed out, she realized it was practically a different game from what she’d played before! From then on, she was hooked on taking screenshots and photos, completely unable to stop.

Especially once the “Dreamscape Gallery” feature unlocked, with built-in beauty filters and endless poses for selfies and duo shots—she just couldn’t get enough!

She used the desktop to log in on her monk character, while Gao Shan sat beside her with his laptop on his healer character, multitasking between his own business and helping her run around, posing for pictures.

“Do the ‘kneeling’ action. I’ll meditate here. From this angle, it’ll look like you’re lying peacefully in my arms... Now do ‘shy’, and I’ll do a bow from behind; there’s a moment where it looks like I’m hugging you from behind... Hahaha, the male character’s ‘pushed down’ pose is so pervy. Looks like a celibate master being ravished by Queen Healer...”

Words alone weren’t enough; sometimes live demonstrations were required.

“Just like this!” Tang Chu commanded him to stand up as she stepped behind him. “I’ll hug you from behind, look down at you, and you turn your head to gaze at me, deep in my eyes... Wait, squat down a bit, I can’t reach... Still can’t reach. Forget it, I’ll stand on the step... Why are your shoulders so wide? There’s no way a healer is this buff, I can’t get my arms around you! ...Act more bashful! You’re the girl, I’m the guy!”

Swapping genders in-game was no big deal, but in real life, it was... mysteriously awkward. =_=b

Gao Shan turned around. “Forget it. Let’s just rehearse the Queen Healer pinning down the Celibate Master pose.”

...

Tang Chu had heard long ago that the character animations in Sword of Legends III were all motion-captured from real martial artists, which was why the movements were so natural and smooth. Now she could only sincerely marvel—those martial artists must be incredibly flexible...

[Speed Challenge]

Besides taking photos, the two would occasionally team up for battlegrounds or arenas. At Gao Shan’s current level, battlegrounds were a breeze. His arena tactics and awareness were solid, he knew all the classes and their skills inside and out, and he always took command. The only issue was his technical execution...

Practice makes perfect and diligence can compensate for lack of talent, but there’s no denying that innate ability plays a decisive role in many things.

“Focus fire on the Sword Pure! Their transfer’s down! I’ll thunderlock the Poison Healer! Poison Healer didn’t cleanse the CC!”

Her little monk swung at the half-health Sword Pure, but as soon as the health dropped, it shot right back up—now with a damage reduction buff from the Sacred Hand, while Poison Healer instantly cast two ice silkworms, both characters back to full health.

Tang Chu glared at the loli Poison Healer bouncing all over the battlefield. “What happened to your thunderlock?”

Gao Shan, shameless as ever, replied, “It landed on the Five Venoms’ pet instead.”

Now she could mock his clumsy hands without restraint, boasting about her computer science senior, her company’s mentor, and the godlike hand speed of professional players with starry-eyed admiration.

Gao Shan snorted and tossed her a link.

Tang Chu clicked to find an article titled: “Pro eSports Players Under Fire: Premature Ejaculation Common Among Gaming Aces.”

-__-b

Suddenly she could never look at in-game experts the same way again...

[Pumpkin Porridge]

The whole family went out for Korean barbecue. Before the main dishes arrived, the server brought everyone a small bowl of pumpkin porridge. Tang Chu took a sip and exclaimed, “This is delicious! The pumpkin flavor is rich and sweet, and there’s a hint of creaminess!”

Her father and Aunt Gao agreed.

The little bowl, served as a pre-meal dessert, was quickly finished. Gao Shan pushed his bowl toward her. “This one’s for you too.”

Tang Chu pushed it back. “No need, you have it. I’ll just ask the server if we can order an extra.”

Aunt Gao interjected, “Don’t be polite, he doesn’t like this stuff.”

Tang Chu was surprised. “You’re a picky eater? Don’t like pumpkin?” This was the first time she’d seen him dislike any food.

“It’s not the pumpkin,” Aunt Gao explained, “he just doesn’t like mushy foods. He had too much of it when he was little. After I gave birth, I was so weak I weighed less than a hundred pounds, and my milk dried up before he was even a month old. Times were tough then, so we fed him rice gruel—he ate it until he was over a year old, until he could eat solid food, and then he never touched gruel again, not even a spoonful. It’s still the same now.”

Tang Chu said, “It must have been hard raising a child alone back then, Auntie.” As she spoke, she sneaked a glance at Gao Shan and quietly took his hand under the table.

Aunt Gao laughed. “Oh, it wasn’t too bad. Shan-shan was cooking by the time he was five. After that, I barely had to worry about anything at home—he ate better than before, too, haha...”

Meals made by a five-year-old were better than what he’d had before... Just what was he eating from one to five years old! No wonder he won’t touch rice gruel ever again.

So pitiful... She gave him a look full of sympathy.

That’s why I swore to learn how to cook well. He answered her with his eyes.

Aunt Gao continued reminiscing. “Shan-shan was a very good kid, easy to look after. I’d go out and leave him at home with his blocks—he’d play all day, never cried or fussed, I never had to hit him.”

Gao Shan interjected, “Who says you never hit me? What about that time with the broomstick?”

Aunt Gao turned to her father, a bit sheepish. “See? You shouldn’t hit kids. He still remembers something from when he was three.”

Tang Chu said, “A smack with the broom isn’t so bad. My mom used to do that all the time when I was little...” Wait, that’s probably not something to brag about...

“Maybe it’s because he didn’t get enough milk as a baby—he loved chewing on his pacifier, even at three years old. He’d bite down on it, making it squeak, and wouldn’t spit it out for anything, so I gave him a spanking. Just once! Now I see all these parenting articles saying that discipline like that can cause psychological damage. I’m sorry, it was my fault—don’t hold a grudge, okay?” Aunt Gao patted the back of Gao Shan’s hand.

No wonder he likes to bite things now, especially... She glanced at him, and their eyes met. She couldn’t help blushing.

As for the pumpkin porridge she wanted, the server explained it was a complimentary starter and couldn’t be ordered separately, but if she really wanted, they could bring her another bowl.

She accepted the second free bowl, a little embarrassed. Just as she set it down, Gao Shan reached over with his spoon and took a bite.

“Hey?” She turned to see him put the spoon in his mouth. “I thought you didn’t eat this?”

He tasted it lightly with the tip of his tongue, then set the spoon down. “Have to try it if I’m going to replicate it at home.”

Her father didn’t catch on. “Replicate what?”

Tang Chu lowered her head, smiling as she savored the sweet, fragrant pumpkin porridge. So soft and sweet.

[Inherited Schemes]

Back home for the New Year, the two of them curled up together in an old wicker chair, flipping through photo albums. Tang Chu came across a picture of Gao Shan’s parents when they were young.

The background was a solid color. The two people in the photo, captured from the waist up, looked a bit stiff and formal, but the joy in their eyes couldn’t be hidden. Aunt Gao wore two neat braids, pure and pretty; the young man beside her was the spitting image of Gao Shan, with a short buzz cut—handsome and shy.

At the bottom of the photo, “Lanling Photo Studio” was printed. On the back, in neat vertical script with a fountain pen, it read: “Gao Jie, Mai Shixuan—A Hundred Years of Harmony.” The blue ink had blurred at the edges with age, and the writing had faded.

“So your father’s last name is Mai...” She suddenly remembered something. “Who gave you your name?”

Gao Shan sighed in resignation. “My grandfather.”

His father’s surname was Mai, and he was named Shan. Clearly, his grandfather had never intended for him to change his surname back to his father’s—scheming runs in the family!