Fifty

When she was talking on the phone with Xiaoying that evening, Huang Qi sighed, “I never thought the story of Chen Shimei would remain so popular, still being told a thousand years later. You really have to keep your eyes wide open when choosing a partner.”

Sha Zhouyin replied, “My eyes are open. I won’t make a mistake.”

Huang Qi couldn’t help laughing. “What are you keeping your eyes open for? You’re not a woman.”

“That’s not quite right,” he protested. “This is the new society—men and women are equal. Women need to be wary of heartless men, and men have to guard against being abandoned after being used. Look at our situation: clearly, it’s me who should be clinging to you to prevent you from dumping me.”

If someone is to be abandoned after a fling, there must first be a fling, right? I haven’t even messed around with you, so how could I abandon you... Huang Qi grumbled inwardly and muttered, “I’m not that kind of person.”

“Mmm, little Qi, I have faith in you.” His voice was low and gentle. “But when two people want to be together, there are always many challenges. The greater the differences, the harder it is, and the more severe the test. These two hometown friends you mentioned—even if the guy stays true, their prospects aren’t bright.”

Huang Qi was displeased and intentionally huffed, “Hey, are you going to start defending Chen Shimei now? Typical—men all stick together, birds of a feather!”

Sha Zhouyin laughed. “What are you talking about? If you want to draw a parallel with us, then you’d be the triumphant top scholar Chen Shimei basking in success, while I’d be the pitiful Qin Xianglian, wouldn’t I? Compared with Tongfu, at least I won’t end up with a belly and be a single mother, but in other respects, I’m not far off. How does that make me a Chen Shimei apologist?”

What do you mean ‘with a belly’—how ambiguous! It’s not like just hugging and holding hands could get you pregnant! Huang Qi was full of complaints and instinctively wanted to steer away from this topic. “Stop with the comparisons. We are us, they are them. Everyone walks their own path. There’s no point in comparing.”

“I’m just speaking objectively. From what you’ve said, those two are too young and immature. Suddenly faced with such a dramatic change and sharp conflict in life, it’s easy to handle things badly. You said that girl is very kind, but kindness alone can’t solve problems. Sometimes, being a truly good person is much harder than being a selfish one—it requires much more courage and ability.”

This was apparent with Tongfu. If she were a bit more selfish and steeled her heart to have an abortion, she would recover in a couple of months and nothing more would come of it. But because she’s soft-hearted and can’t bear to do it, she now faces a lifetime of burden and responsibility. She’ll need immense courage to deal with the stigma of being an unmarried single mother, and the ability to support a family and raise a child—real, pressing pressures. Huang Qi couldn’t bear to imagine the difficulties that lay ahead.

Thinking of these realities made her feel heavy-hearted. She asked gloomily, “Xiaoying, is it really so hard for two people from different backgrounds to be together? I think we’re getting along just fine now.”

Sha Zhouyin said, “If it’s just a romance between two people, then of course it’s simple. But if, in the future… it’s mainly family conflicts. Little Qi, your parents still don’t know about us, do they?”

“No, I haven’t told them yet. Do you think I should?” She asked, then immediately reconsidered. “Forget it. I still have three years of school left, and while I’m a student, it’s not like there’s anything we can do. Better to wait until I graduate and start working.”

“Thank you, little Qi. Thank you for being so understanding.” His voice was low and steady. “Three years from now, I can’t guarantee I’ll be rich or powerful, but I’ll definitely be doing better than I am now.”

“Of course! Xiaoying, you’ve always been amazing. Three years ago, you’d just come of age and left school to work, and now you’re a foreman, leading over a hundred people! I really think you’re a great investment.”

He laughed. “I don’t have much confidence in myself, but I believe in your judgment.”

“Come on!” Huang Qi could never handle being teased. “Who exactly are you praising? Yourself or me? And you call that having no self-confidence?”

Three years really can change a lot. She thought of Uncle Biao, who three years ago was just a foreman like Xiaoying is now, but now he’s a big boss with his own company, barely able to keep up with back-to-back projects. He was able to make it in his thirties; Xiaoying is only in his early twenties. His future is wide open—there’s no need to pass judgment because of a temporary setback.

In fact, Huang Qi had a little scheme of her own. She was twenty-two now—the prime age for marriage back home, the most sought-after stage for a girl, so her parents’ standards were bound to be high. But when she finished her master’s, she’d be twenty-five—or twenty-six by traditional age count. Even if her parents were still opposed, after a year or two she’d be considered a late bloomer, and they’d have to give in eventually.

As Xiaoying always said, nothing in the world is truly difficult—if you’re willing to find solutions, you’ll always manage. She was already working on solutions, though her approach was a bit sneaky. Still, it was best to keep these thoughts to herself, lest he scold her.

After chatting a while longer, her phone rang. It was Bai Luyao. Huang Qi had been so busy with Tongfu’s situation lately she hadn’t had time for Bai Luyao and hadn’t been in touch for a while. She wondered how things were going for her.

Xiaoying heard the ringtone too. “Someone’s looking for you? Go ahead and take it, I’ll call you again tomorrow night.”

“All right, but you promised—you have to call!”

She hung up and answered Bai Luyao. “Hello, Yao Yao?”

Bai Luyao asked, “What have you been so busy with lately? You don’t even reply to my messages on QQ. Is your thesis giving you that much trouble?”

Huang Qi replied, “The thesis is fine, I’m just writing it up. I had some personal matters that kept me busy for half a month—I haven’t even been online. Did you need something?”

“So, are you free now? My thesis defense is tomorrow morning—can you make it?”

“You’re defending this early? I still have two more weeks to go.”

Bai Luyao said, “We’re in the humanities, no projects, so we defend earlier. Once I’m done, I’ll treat you to lunch!”

“I’ll definitely be free for lunch. But I won’t understand your defense, and they don’t usually let outsiders in, do they? I’ll just wait till you’re done and come mooch lunch off you at noon.”

“All right,” Bai Luyao paused, “Are you free in the afternoon too?”

Huang Qi picked up on her hesitation. “What’s going on? Are you all right?”

“Don’t worry, last time’s issues are basically behind me—I’m doing well now. But I have a new worry I want to talk to you about.”

Huang Qi immediately asked, “What is it?”

“Huang Qi, I think I…” Bai Luyao hesitated, “I think I’ve fallen for someone.”

Huang Qi’s first reaction was, “Who?”

Bai Luyao seemed embarrassed, and after a long pause, she said, “My advisor.”

Huang Qi knew this was trouble. Anyone supervising undergrad theses had to be at least an associate professor, and at P University, that meant they were definitely not young. “How old is your advisor?”

“Thirty-eight.”

Bai Luyao was only twenty—a full eighteen years younger, nearly twice her age. The age gap was the least of it; the real issue was the student-teacher aspect and possibly interfering with someone else’s family. “At thirty-eight, he must be married, right? Is this a one-sided crush, or have things already…?”

Bai Luyao replied, “No, he’s still single. I just have these feelings, he doesn’t know…”

“That’s a relief,” Huang Qi breathed easier. “Yao Yao, are you sure what you feel is romantic love, and not just gratitude or dependence because he helped you through hard times?”

“There’s certainly gratitude and dependence, but that’s not all… I may have never been in love, but I know this is more than gratitude. It’s exactly like the feeling Sun Hongguang once described to me—my heart races, I want to get closer to him, and even a slight touch of his hand makes me nervous. That’s never happened before. To put it this way, Huang Qi, you saved me in high school, and I’ve always been grateful and dependent on you, but what I feel for my advisor is completely different.”

Huang Qi found the comparison a bit awkward. “But Yao Yao, even if he’s single, he’s still your professor. I don’t know about your university’s rules, but at ours, a teacher-student romance would get the professor dismissed. If you really like him, you must restrain yourself, okay?”

Bai Luyao’s voice lowered, “I understand… And I know he’s only single because the woman he loved married someone else. In his eyes, I’m just a naive kid; he’d never be interested in me…”

Huang Qi’s mind was foggy with exhaustion from handling Tongfu’s situation, and now Bai Luyao had a new problem—both dealing with complicated ethical dilemmas. As someone rather naive and clumsy herself, she felt out of her depth. All she could do was comfort Bai Luyao: “Yao Yao, don’t overthink things. Focus on your defense tomorrow, and we’ll talk it all through when we meet.”

After hanging up, she thought it over. It wasn’t entirely a bad thing. What happened with Sun Hongguang had left Bai Luyao with psychological scars, to the point where she doubted she could ever have a normal life. Now, she had actually developed feelings for someone and wanted to get closer—somehow, the problem seemed to have resolved itself. The only issue was that the person was her advisor, who had no interest in her beyond the teacher-student relationship. In the end, it was just the common problem of a female student with an unrequited crush on her male teacher.

Huang Qi regretted neglecting Bai Luyao lately. She had thought an experienced advisor would be better at guiding her, but it turned out his wisdom and charisma had only enchanted her, leading to this teacher-student crush.

It seemed her husband’s advice wasn’t infallible after all. And listening to him too much wasn’t good either—how could the wise and valiant Lord of the City allow herself to be so henpecked?