Volume One, Chapter 16: A Change of Heart

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Hearing those words shattered my heart. Although I already knew the truth, seeing it repeatedly laid bare before me still made me unbearably sad. Truly sorrowful.

I turned my head away, unwilling to utter another word.

After a long silence, the doctor spoke: “Auntie, right now only our Dr. Liu can treat this illness. We fully understand your concerns about the cost—it’s very expensive—but if the treatment works, even a little improvement would be a breakthrough in medical science.”

The moment it became about value, my mother hesitated immediately: “Doctor, you’re kind and well-meaning, we understand that. But my husband passed away a couple of years ago, and as an old woman, I have no means to support the family—our only hope is my son. If you ask him to sell his company for treatment, and if he recovers I still have a son. But if he doesn’t, then I, this old woman, will be left with nothing!”

Su Qingya bit her lip and said, “Mom, we won’t divorce. But if that day really comes... I’ll take care of you.”

Hearing Su Qingya speak for me stirred no feelings within me—only a sense of wistfulness. How I wished she had said this sooner, even before my surgery. Perhaps then everything might have been different.

“You take care of me? After what you’ve done to my son, you still want to take care of me? It’s a miracle I’m not dead from all the torment!” my mother sneered sarcastically. “When that day comes, I’ll be an old woman all alone with no one. You’ll have no ties to me anymore, and if you remarry, who knows where I’d even find you!”

“Oh, my poor son—”

“Enough... I’m not dead yet. Mom, you’re tired. You should go home.” Just those few words brought a bitter, metallic taste to my throat.

The farce was over. I grew impatient as visitors gradually left the room.

Lu Feng noticed Su Qingya was still in the ward and frowned. Just as he was about to confront her, Liu Ying stopped him: “Alright, senior, no matter how much you care, this is their family matter.”

Lu Feng anxiously said, “After what Su Qingya did to Gu Ze, how can I trust them sharing a room?”

“No matter how anxious you are, it’s useless unless that foolish cuckold comes to terms with it himself.” Liu Ying nonchalantly pulled out her phone and began ordering takeout. “Besides, Su Qingya’s attitude has changed a lot; she didn’t even bring her pretty boy along. Maybe she’s really reconsidering.”

Indeed, even a just official cannot settle family disputes. Lu Feng glared at Su Qingya in frustration: “I’ll go prepare dinner for Gu Ze. I’ll be back soon. You’d better not make any moves.”

Through the glass’s reflection, I gazed at Su Qingya’s face.

During this time, I shuttled between the ICU and the operating room, barely conscious, let alone having a moment alone with my former lover.

I wanted to break the silence between us but didn’t know what to say; so I remained silent.

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“...Gu Ze, I didn’t mean to that day,” Su Qingya murmured.

That day? Which day? I wanted to ask, but no desire to talk surfaced.

Wasn’t every moment with me filled with curses and cruelty?

I sensed a dark irony in this conversation and couldn’t help but curl the corner of my lips.

Yet Su Qingya seemed to misunderstand me.

“I know. You can mock me now if you want. After all, I did so many terrible things to you...”

I said nothing, just blankly stared at her reflection in the glass.

“I told Xu Zixuan we wouldn’t see each other for a while.”

But whether she saw him or not was none of my business. Xu Zixuan was her lover, not mine.

“I’ll stay by your side during this time, take care of you... make up for all the wrongs I’ve done to you over the years.”

I glanced at her.

In my eyes, Su Qingya had always been like a princess. In the many years we spent together, she was always the one on top. I had never heard her apologize to anyone.

“Gu Ze... I don’t want to lose you,” Su Qingya said with deep regret, tears streaming as she leaned over my bedside, looking utterly pitiful.

“If only... you’d said something like this sooner,” I smiled at her, “Don’t waste your time on me, Qingya.”

“That’s not a waste of time...” Su Qingya shook her head hard, eyes and nose red.

The last time I saw her cry like this was at the university sports meet, when Fu Huaijin got injured during the long-distance race. She cried and asked him a foolish question: “Huaijin, you won’t die, right?”

I was there then, watching Fu Huaijin kiss her smooth forehead, wipe away her tears, and gently comfort her until she smiled again.

As for how Su Qingya cried the day Fu Huaijin passed away, I didn’t know.

Because after leaving the police station, I never saw Su Qingya again until three months later, when she appeared before me with Shen Huai.

He was the first person beside her who looked strikingly like Fu Huaijin.

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“Gu Ze, I don’t want you to die. Please don’t die...”

I knew Su Qingya desperately needed comfort at that moment. I too wished she’d stop crying—this expression didn’t suit her.

She should be a radiant flower blooming freely under the sun.

But even a lie was beyond me to say.

“Qingya... thank you for helping pay my medical fees. After the divorce, I’ll repay you.” I thought for a moment and joked lightly, “Can I pay with the company’s shares? After all, I’m leaving empty-handed. If you don’t agree, I really won’t be able to pay.”

Su Qingya shook her head through tears: “Don’t say that...”

“It’s okay.” I began tidying up things on my own, “My mom... she’s just like that. Over the years, I’ve sent her money every month, given her red envelopes during festivals—sometimes tens of thousands, sometimes hundreds of thousands. I never stopped sending supplements. Altogether, it must amount to several million.”

“I’ve also spoken with the lawyer, reviewed the draft contract four times. You shouldn’t be taken advantage of by my mom anymore.”

By now, Su Qingya was sobbing uncontrollably: “Gu Ze, please stop... I really... I shouldn’t have treated you that way before. I know you blame me, but I don’t want to divorce you...”

I looked at her in surprise; I never imagined I’d hear such words from her mouth in my lifetime.

If she had cried like this before, I don’t know how heartbroken I would have been. But now, all I felt was relief.

I smiled at those swollen yet still beautiful eyes: “Qingya... I don’t blame you. I forgive you.”

Feeling the conversation had reached its end, I had nothing more to say.

The ward fell silent, Su Qingya leaning against the bed, staring blankly at me.

That expression was all too familiar—the look of longing for a response. Because for over ten years, that was how I had always looked at Su Qingya.

Absent-minded, persistent, like a loyal puppy.

But I was tired.

Looking at Su Qingya, I spoke slowly and clearly: “The one who should apologize is me, Qingya... I’m sorry, I’m too exhausted to love you anymore...”

Su Qingya wiped her tears and gave a bitter smile as if she had made up her mind: “It’s okay... I’ll always stay with you.”